Old Friends:  Common sense, logic and manners revisited.



First, I must say that the original intent of this page was a prerecorded message for this individual who is continuously sending a link of his (allpictures of himself) web page in the room asking ladies to go see it.  This, without trying to establish a conversation with anyone in the room.  Don't you think that if mere looks were the only qualifier, the two pictures you managed to squeeze in your profile would be enough, ArtistGuy??? <grin>

He has been my most stubborn disciple, thus my longest lasting toy. However; if I see that he mends his ways, I might decide to delete this dedication <smile>.

I actually enjoy being sarcastic.  I don't usually pick on people unless  by their own behavior they label themselves my next "victim".  The types of behavior I may target includes, but is not limited to:
  • Nasty Comments
  • Inappropriate requests
  • Whining
  • Complaining too much
  • People who are too conceited
Of course, I am the sole decision maker as to what I find objectable or acceptable as well as to who gets away with it or who doesn't.  If you are not the targeted individual and don't like what I am doing your alternatives include:
  • Ignore me
  • Leave the room
  • Join the dispute
The one thing that is not an alternative is telling me to stop.  Not because you cannot say it but because it will accomplish absolutely nothing  <grin> other than my attention potentially expanding to include you, that is.  Yes, I am aware that I am the first to break some of these basic concepts, but as long as I am aware of the consequences and can deal with it, it is  my problem and no one else's...:-)

I have no clue how the rest of the page ended up as you see it here now.  Somehow it took a life of its own <rolling eyes>.  But scroll  down to the "manners" parts to continue the prior tone.



Chatrooms provide the ability to talk with people all over the world that you might not have otherwise gotten a chance to meet.

One thing to maintain in mind is that this is a form of entertainment. An interactive TV, if you wish to compare it to something more traditional. The experience should be an enjoyable one as long as common sense, logic and manners prevail.

Anonymity provides some users with the ability to temporarily develop on-line alter egos.  Hence, taking everything you read at face value from someone you haven't known for an extended period may not be wise.  When do you usually get to know the person at the other end?  That varies from person to person as it does in any other setting.

Personally, I have used on-line chatting for a period of about 6 years...  <grin> No, not consecutively!!!  Although I have developed a few long lasting friendships I remain of the opinion that the overall value is entertainment.

With the development of video chats, anonymity has lost one of its elements.  You can now see the face of the person at the other end.  That shouldn't necessarily increase your trust factor.  You still don't  know that person well enough nor what they are capable of.  Judging a book by its cover has often led to error in judgment.  The mere fact that someone looks or sounds at first like a nice person doesn't necessarily mean that they are, the reverse is true as well.

Common sense, logic, the normal practice of basic safety and manners are irreplaceable elements in any setting where you are dealing with others.

Safety is critical and should be taught to children before you ever allow them access to that computer.  Remember, if they have access to the internet to do homework, they most likely have access to chatrooms of one kind or another.

As adults we know this (although at times some forget).  Where kids are concerned we must continuously remind them that on the internet EVERYONE is a stranger.  Regardless of how long they have been chatting for, until (and maybe not even then) an adult parent determines otherwise.

Some basic Safety tips include:
  • Don't provide your last name.
  • Don't provide your address.
  • Don't provide your phone number.
  • Don't ever mention the name of your school or workplace.
Basically, information which can be used by others to physically find you. Any information which can lead to stalking, or perhaps worse, shouldn't be disclosed.



Now, for the part I intended to write in the first place (but couldn't overlook  the safety for kids first):

Whining, begging, pleading, lost of temper and other heavy emotional displays are unacceptable in the cyber world. Unlike live situations this world is fully equipped with an "ON/OFF" button <smirk> learn when to use it!

Whether female or male, never forget that you have as much power to control your environment as others do.

Most of the tips below are plain common sense and normal practice for most. Nothing is 100% fail proof but it sure helps minimize unpleasant encounters:

Before talking to any individual one on one:
  • Observe the individual's chat pattern in the room.  If their conversations with others is not to your liking, odds are you will not enjoy a one to one chat either.
  • If you haven't seen them chat before, then..... <grin> don't complain about surprises.
  • Use your profile to let others know what you won't put up with.
  • Read the profile of others before accepting a one to one chat. Especially if you haven't had a chance to observe their chat pattern.
Example: If you are a female interested only in a fun uninvolved chat and the profile says "Hot male looking for hot female for lusting relationship"  Well, what do you think you are most likely to encounter during that  conversation?  Yeap, complain about that one and you'll read my unsolicited  comments <grin>
  • Personally, there are some screen names that I will arbitrarily avoid without further investigation.  Hey, it's MY computer time and I'll do as I please, so there!!!
  • Don't be shy, be blunt if you think it will help get your point across.
  • When faced with adversity, maintain your integrity, style and class. No one can make you loose any of those until you elect to give them up.
  • First impressions go a long way.  Avoid vulgarities at all cost, especially in public settings.  If you have reached that point, be gracious, excuse yourself and return when you have cooled off.  Remember that vulgarities are said by those with nothing else left to say.
  • Be respectful of others, but most important, respect yourself.  Avoid exchanges that would lead you to loose control of the situation.
  • A chatroom (unless private or monitored) is a public place.  Yes, you can say as you wish but there are also consequences. Others may tell you what they think of you, whether you wish to know it or not. If you cannot stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.
  • Don't go into a room thinking you are God's gift to the world.  Others might point out to you that you are not and top it by informing you that you are obnoxious as well.
  • There is an old but true saying:  "there is a time and a place for everything"  Don't go into a general room and make sexual requests or innuendoes.  You'll be creamed by the regulars that won't put up with that stuff.
  • Following that logic, don't go into an X-Rated room telling others to behave or asking them to clean up their language. Behave according to the setting you have selected or don't go there at all.
  • For those interested in more than just chatting, ask in a polite, refined and tactful manner. It will save you the potential of public embarrassment and humiliation (which may happen anyway).
  • Repeating requests or insisting will usually lead to comments you may which to avoid.

  • Don't expect everyone to like you nor expect to like everyone. Those are unrealistic expectations.
  • If you have an emotional need to feel accepted concentrate on those you like that also like you.
  • Being too sensitive and publicly displaying it often places you a disadvantage.  It is like playing poker with see through cards.
  • Don't ever change to please others. The only person you are obligated to please is yourself. Your friends will accept you as you are, if they don't, they weren't your friends to start with.
  • If you are truly happy with yourself, what others think of you will be of little significance.  Of course, it is normal to value the opinion of loved ones and close friends.  Just be careful to not loose your individuality in the process.
  • People you value will at one point or another do things you don't like or might hurt your feelings. Don't loose sight of the big picture due to an isolated incident.
The above are just some common sense things to keep in mind.  No list is all inclusive.  Violation of chat etiquette common sense will subject your behavior to painful criticism.  If I am present the time....  6 out of 10 times I'll be the one supplying the unsolicited comments...  Care to test your odds at catching me in one of those 4 odd days???  <grin>

You are more than welcome to point out my flaws as well. I am aware of most of them and can live with them. The need of acceptance, especially in this setting, is not a driving factor in my life.

People watching is a fascinating pass time.  Observing what makes different people react and how they go about it is truly priceless entertainment.


  • Caps imply you are yelling. A non-offensive alternative is to bold or use a larger font size.
  • a/s/l (age, sex, location) annoying! Especially among the mature groups.
  • Private chats - you may wish to politely ask first if you don't know that person well.
  • Displays of affection - not everyone is the huggy kissy type. Don't assume those are any less friendly because they don't and vise versa.
  • Screen names - select one that fits you and suitable to your online interest.


Some abbreviations used often in rooms (yes, I omitted some on purpose and others I just don't know yet):
  • AAMOF = As a matter of fact
  • A/S/L = age, sex, location (use at your own risk)
  • BBFN = Bye bye for now
  • BBL = Be back later
  • BG = Big grin
  • BRB = Be right back
  • BTW = By the way
  • EG = Evil grin
  • FICCL = Frankly, I couldn't care less
  • FSD = Fools seldom differ
  • GMTA = Great minds think alike
  • HB = Hurry back
  • JK = Just kidding
  • LTNS = Long time no see
  • LOL = Laughing out loud
  • M8 = mate
  • ROFL = Rolling on the floor laughing
  • TGIF = Thank God is Friday
  • TTFN = Ta ta for now
  • TY = Thank you
  • U = you (why anyone would abbreviate a three letter word is beyond comprehension)
  • WB = Welcome back


The buttons below will take you to other sections of my site:






Now, lets go back to the room and have fun!!!












The above is based on personal experiences and observation.  I have no formal training on human behavior nor should my opinions guide the behavior of others.  Use your own common sense and instinct at all times.